Monday, March 31, 2014

Ass helping pants

I was outside a bit ago and overheard this conversation coming from the hot tub near my apartment:

Girl 1:  "Oh no, the jets stopped."

Girl 2:  "I'll turn them back on."

Girl 1:  "Wow, you have a really nice ass."

Girl 2:  "These pants really help, don't they?"

Girl 1:  "I need to find ass helping pants like those."

Girl 2:  "We'll go shopping this week and I'll show you where I got them."

Girl 1:  "I'll get my mom's credit card.  I need some ass helping pants really bad."

This is not a conversation you usually hear between guys.  I also learned that there's such a thing as "ass helping pants".

I'm going to save up some money to buy myself a pair.  They sound amazing.

The hot tub (a photo I shot a few months ago during the winter... which explains the steam).
This is where the ass helping pants were located tonight.

Sunday, March 30, 2014

Would you like some cookie nookie?

Anthony and I went to the grocery store for our usual Sunday shopping trip.  He had pizza delivered to our apartment before we left to shop so there's really no exciting dinner to report today.  I'm sure you're broKENhearted.  (That, and I forgot to take a picture of the pizza... oopsie).

Anyway, this was the final adventure of a stranger than average weekend.  Friday night was the weird dinner with Anthony and Jason (I posted about that earlier in my blog), yesterday was the minor car accident and then evening spent live Tweeting the riot incident at Main Gate Square / University of Arizona on @whatsuptucson as heard through the police scanner (increased my Twitter follower count by about 300 interestingly enough), and today I felt stiff muscles in my back all day (probably due to the car accident... good times) and just dealt via Facebook with a rather angry show viewer who doesn't like how we post segment videos to the internet.  Maybe a massive heart attack or major case of diarrhea will end this weekend nicely (that's a joke if you couldn't tell).

It was a very routine trip to Walmart Neighborhood Market at 22nd and Craycroft.  We went later than usual, store traffic was pretty light, and we got it done pretty fast.  I did find a few interesting products to photograph:

Pillsbury Bunny Shape Sugar Cookies
A bit misleading -- the cookies are round with a bunny design
but not actually shaped like a bunny.
Unless I missed the memo that bunnies are now perfectly round.

Bill Johnson's Barbecue Sauce
I decided to buy one because it's bottled in Glendale, Arizona
and as everyone knows, when you think barbecue, you think Glendale.

PB Crave Razzle Dazzle, Cookie Nookie, and Choco Choco Peanut Butter.
Razzle Dazzle, Cookie Nookie, and Choco Choco sounds like a date I've had.

Anthony's thumb has turned green

I wrote a few days ago about the orange flowers that Jennifer from Ridgepointe Apartments was kind enough to give us.

Anthony decided to take the initiative to go shopping today (with some help from his mom) and purchase a pot, soil, a little shovel, a stand, and a little collection of flower growing boxes.  Even though he despises getting dirty, he put on some gloves and got his gloved hands dirty to repot the orange flowers and plant seeds in the little boxes.

They're now out on the porch to get some sun.  And, it turns out, he's got a little bit of Martha Stewart in him.

The orange flowers in the original little plastic pot

Anthony replanted the flowers into this much larger pot

The process of planting seeds in the little flower boxes

They came with soil and a packet of seeds for each of the three little boxes

Adding water to the soil to get it ready to plant

Adding soil to the box

It's fun playing in the dirt!

Boxes have dirt and seeds planted and all ready

The orange flowers and the flower boxes on their new stand outside.
Now grow!

Saturday, March 29, 2014

I was rear ended at Pima Street and Swan Road

Anthony and I were in the car in search of dinner tonight at about 6:15 p.m. when a girl in an aqua colored Honda rear ended us at Pima Street and Swan Road while we were stopped at the traffic light.

This is the second accident I've had in this particular car.  The first one was in the spring of 2008.  I was rear ended as well at Prince Road and 1st Ave while sitting at a stoplight.  That accident caused over $9,000 in damage to the car and I got a bump on the head.

Today's accident was miraculous.  A very loud bang, it shook the car, we pulled into a nearby parking lot.  It was miraculous because there was not a scratch on my bumper.  I couldn't find any kind of damage at all.  This is the same area of the car that was completely replaced in that 2008 accident.  It was also miraculous because I have no physical affects from the accident.  Anthony says that he has a sore neck.  At this point we haven't had it looked at, he wanted to wait and see if it got any worse.  I'm not discounting Anthony's discomfort, but I consider any accident miraculous if that is the most awful thing that happened.

The girl who hit us is apparently from Wisconsin and looked college age.  She had valid insurance and valid driver's license so if there is a claim to be filed it'll be fine.  And, she gave me a sob story about being distracted because she recently lost her father.  I was enlightened by this because I wasn't aware that losing a loved one caused a person to become a bad driver who doesn't stop at a stoplight.  If this happens the safest course of action is to take a bus or taxi until the grief subsides.  I learned something new today.

A pretty rim job

Anthony and I had dinner last night with our friend Jason at Rosa's Mexican Food at Campbell and Fort Lowell here in Tucson.

I discovered this restaurant back in the early 2000's when I worked at 93.7 KRQ.  It was a favorite of my co-worker Mark's.  I haven't eaten there much since moving to the other side of town and I kind of miss it.  The food there is excellent.

The last hour of the dinner somehow turned to previous relationships that I've had.  Anthony and Jason each had margaritas while I drank a soda so maybe I can blame it on the alcohol that they were drinking.  I left there feeling kind of beaten down emotionally.  I made my choices along the way and most of them didn't work out.  I'm not even close to perfect nor do I suggest that my opinions or feelings are right compared to anyone else's.  But, it's okay.  They're better people than I am.

I did enjoy the eating part.

Anthony's strawberry margarita at Rosa's Mexican Food
They put some kind of peppery rim on the glass.
It was a pretty rim job.

Jason's mango margarita with the pretty rim job

Jason sucking on his margarita

My chicKEN taco and cheese KENchiladas

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Ridgepointe Apartments gave me orange flowers

I posted on Facebook earlier today that my apartment building is being repainted and I was hoping it would be a festive color like orange.

It's still pea green, but Jennifer at Ridgepointe left an orange flower plant at my door with a card that says "Couldn't change the colors, but I hope this brings some festiveness to your home and a smile to your face."

That's super awesome!

My apartment building isn't orange but these flowers are
Thanks Jennifer at Ridgepointe!
Now, I'm going to attempt to keep them alive.

Meeting Dr. Richard Carmona

I had the privilege of meeting Dr. Richard Carmona today.  He was the 17th Surgeon General of the United States and also a guest on today's TV show.  He's also a professor at the University of Arizona, established the first trauma system in southern Arizona, and even worked with the Pima County Sheriff's Department for 28 years.  Pretty darned impressive resume'.

He was on the show to talk about medical patient safety and while that was important, I just wanted a picture.

I got my wish.

Ken Carr and Dr. Richard Carmona
One of us was a former Surgeon General of the United States
and the other ate a Quik Trip cinnamon roll for breakfast.
You can guess which is which.

Sunday, March 23, 2014

Chips from the top shelf are only for people with a ladder

It's Sunday, the weekly dinner and grocery store day for Anthony and I.

We had dinner at La Salsa at Speedway and Kolb.  We ate about an hour before Arizona basketball game time (playing Gonzaga tonight in the NCAA tournament) and it wasn't busy as a result.  It's usually really busy at lunchtime there so maybe they just aren't as busy at dinner.

Walmart Neighborhood Market at 22nd and Craycroft was the grocery store choice today.  A funny moment when we were in the chip aisle and Anthony decided to try and grab some chips from the top shelf while also holding what remained of his soft drink from La Salsa.  Anthony isn't terribly short, but he's not quite tall enough to easily reach items on the top shelf at this store.  You'll see in the photo he had a bit of trouble and I managed to take a photo while he kept saying "help help".

I have my priorities.  Photo first, help second.

Our order number was 7 at La Salsa, Speedway and Kolb.
I don't know why there is a lime on the sign.

Anthony gets a fork to eat with.
There is almost nothing that he'll eat without using silverware.
He has the cleanest fingers on Earth.

I ordered a taquitos and quesadilla plate and Anthony had taquitos.
The cups have a picture of a lime on it.
I don't know why that's on their logo, I put Diet Coke in it... with no lime.

Anthony put something on his chips that resembled baby food.

Across the street from La Salsa at Speedway and Kolb -- a new Urgent Care facility.
This used to be a golf store.  It tells you a lot about Tucson...
more demand for a place to get something for the flu than new putters and balls.

Anthony pointed out this bottle of pomegranate juice at Walmart Market.
It's ten dollars!  Holy crap!
For that price it should also give you a hand job.

Yes, please.
Oh wait, it's a brand of wine.
Never mind.

This bag of Dream Bone ended up in the chip aisle.
If someone isn't paying attention they'll get a surprise when they dip that in some cheese dip.

Sneaky photo of Anthony:
I think he was trying to make a point in Italian.
I wouldn't have posted this but it kind of goes with the ones below.

Anthony reaches up to the top shelf to grab a bag of chips to read the package
while holding what's left of his drink from La Salsa in his left hand...

Suddenly, he finds himself with bags of chips raining down on his head.
I would have helped him but I had to take this photo.
I have my priorities in order.

Saturday, March 22, 2014

These french fries are a victim of a salt

Anthony and I did dinner out tonight.  We did some fancy dining at In-N-Out Burger and ice cream for dessert at Brushfire Ice Creamery.

I'm a much bigger fan of cheap dining than when I eat out than fancy restaurants.  I almost always think the food at cheap quick restaurants is better.  My thought process about this has been reinforced in recent years when I've watched shows like Chopped on the Food Network.  They often whip up these fancy dishes that don't look delicious.  Give me a greasy cheeseburger and fries any day.  Or any place that serves mashed potatoes and gravy.

I keep it classy.

Anthony adds salt to his already salty fries at In-N-Out Burger at Broadway and Kolb.
Those poor fries are the victim of a salt!

My cheeseburger at In-N-Out was ready for it's extreme Kenparazzi close up.

Anthony stabs a straw into his Nutella Rocky Road with peanut butter shake
at Brushfire Ice Creamery at 22nd and Kolb

Pre-shake consuming meditation

My single scoop (3 bean vanilla ice cream) fudge sundae at Brushfire Ice Creamery.
They don't do hot fudge, but they make their sauces from scratch so all was not lost.
But, they were out of Co2 cartridges so they couldn't add any whipped cream.
I was crying inside.

Friday, March 21, 2014

Long, hard, shiny thing on TV

One of the segments I booked this week was a jet dragster that will be at this weekend's Nitro Jam event at Southwestern International Raceway at the Pima County Fairgrounds.

It was a complicated to produce because we don't shoot segments outside very often.  But, it was worth it and looked great on TV.

If you're wondering, a jet dragster is a drag racing vehicle that is powered by a jet engine.  As in, the kind they use on airplanes.  The car regularly goes 300+ miles per hour and only weighs about 1300 pounds including the driver.  The decision was made not to have them turn it on because it would have melted the pavement in our parking lot for about 60 feet behind the vehicle.

Larsen Motorsports jet dragster
Cool fact: This race team uses all female drivers

Thursday, March 20, 2014

Meeting Don Collier, Henry Darrow, and Rudy Ramos

TV acting legends Don Collier, Henry Darrow, and Rudy Ramos were guests on the TV show today.  They are part of a reunion for "The High Chaparral" this weekend in Tucson.  "The High Chaparral" is a western themed TV show that aired on NBC from 1967-1971 and much of the show was filmed in Tucson at Old Tucson Studios.

Photo time!

TV / acting legends Don Collier, Henry Darrow, and Rudy Ramos with Ken Carr
Three of these guys are true legends, and one is a legend in his own mind.

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Tucson Police invade my neighborhood

The Tucson Police invaded my neighborhood tonight.  Actually, invade may be a strong term for the situation.

The officers were looking for someone in the neighborhood directly south and east of my apartment complex.  Right after I shot the photos you'll see below, a couple of officers on foot walked past me in the parking lot here in the complex.  They were scouring the neighborhood looking for their man or woman and even had a police dog with them.

I listened to the police scanner for a while after I snapped these pictures and I think they found who they were looking for but it took a while.  It's not easy to find what you're searching for in the dark even if you have a helicopter, a dozen police officers, and a dog working on it.

Bad boys bad boys... whatcha gonna do?

(By the way, my Canon SX50 camera with the super duper 1200mm zoom lens came in handy for this.  I was able to get these photos from over a block away).

Tucson Police at Pima Street and Sonoita Street looking for a suspect
at 10:30 p.m. on March 18, 2014.

Blinky colored emergency lights excite me

Prairie doggin'

I spotted a couple of prairie dogs in the desert lot behind the TV station when I was leaving work today.  They were frolicking around but I was able to get a few shots when they stopped moving.

Every time I see a creature that even slightly resembles these I think of the movie Caddyshack.  Even though it was a gopher that Bill Murray was trying to kill.

No Mr. Prairie Dog, hiding behind that tiny plant does not make you
invisible to the Kenparazzi.

I think I got his good side.

That's a big hole you've dug, Mr. Prairie Dog!

Monday, March 17, 2014

My face is on a flower

One of the TV show guests we had today offers a unique service:  Printing a message, logo, or picture on an organic item.  They can do it on fruits, vegetables, and flowers.

The business is called "Messages Remembered" on 4th Avenue.  They brought a sample to show today and they took a photo from my Facebook page and printed it on a flower.

It's pretty neat how it works.  I think the most remarkable thing is that putting my face on the flower didn't cause the flower to immediately wilt.

Printed logos, messages and even my stupid face on flowers from Messages Remembered

Trying to impress you with my ability to hold a vase full of flowers
A photo of Lucky and I printed on a rose

Sunday, March 16, 2014

The gayest cake mix I have ever seen

It's Sunday -- dinner and grocery shopping day for Anthony and I.

Dinner was at Culver's because Anthony had already eaten earlier.  He took a friend out to lunch early in the afternoon and all he wanted was ice cream.  I wanted actual food, and Culver's has both.

I tried their Sourdough burger for the first time.  I love the Sourdough Jack from Jack In The Box and had high hopes that the sourdough burger version at Culver's would be as wonderful.  Unfortunately, even though I like a lot of things I've tried at Culver's, this burger sucked.  They grill onions and put it on the burger and they just ended up slimy and the bread is thin, flat and sad.  I actually removed the onions before eating the sandwich.

We went up the street to Walmart Neighborhood Market for our grocery shopping at Broadway and Camino Seco.  I'm not a fan of this location because they keep it too cold in there and are missing a few items that I normally buy at the Craycroft store.  But, they had a few things I hadn't seen before including the gayest cake mix I have ever seen.

Delicious fries and awful sourdough burger at Culver's.
I figured out the main problem is the sourdough bread is way too thin.
Either that or the Jack In The Box Sourdough Jack has
set too high of a bar for other sourdough burgers.

A lemon on the floor of the Walmart Neighborhood Market at Broadway and Camino Seco.
It lost it's way in the bread aisle.
"C'mon little yellow fruit, I'll help you find your way home"

Regular Cap'n Crunch isn't sweet enough so now there is
Sprinkled Donut Crunch.
On the box it looks like the Cap'n's hand is ejaculating.

New Post Poppin' Pebbles
It fizzes in your mouth.
Which is the same thing that happens when you add beer to your cereal.
So I hear.

Sneaky photo of Anthony in the candy aisle at Walmart Market
When I showed him this photo he said, "I'm Zoolandering down the aisle"
Work it girl.

Colgate One Direction Toothpaste
I took a picture of this last summer at another store.
It must not be selling well now... it was on clearance for one dollar.

Chips Ahoy Ice Cream Creations cookies
Now THIS is an awesome idea.
I bought the Root Beer Float cookies and they really taste like a root beer float!

Duff Goldman, star of "Ace Of Cakes" on TV, has a line of cake mixes.
This variety is Pastel Tie-Dye.
It takes the prize for the gayest cake mix I have ever seen.

Anthony and I were behind the oldest and slowest man on Earth at the checkout stand.
We amused ourselves while waiting by doing stuff like this.
Anthony kept complaining that the guy smelled bad.
I was grateful that the man's smell masked the knee buckling farts I was firing off while in line.