Monday, February 8, 2010

The Ken Carr Diet

I just had a Jumbo Meal Deal from Jack In The Box. Other than cookies that's the first thing I've eaten today. Two tacos, a Jumbo Jack hamburger, fries, and a soda for $3.99. Can't beat it.

Yes, it's true. I do eat more fast food than the average person (I think). I think its magical. Drive up, get handed food, its dirt cheap. The eating experience is quick and nearly painless!

If you have zero time for eating like I do then here are a few suggestions:

*The drive thru is your friend. Its the fastest way to get grub, eat, and get back to more important things like writing stupid blog posts like this one or posting Tweets on Twitter from the bathroom.

*Less is better. I'm not talking about food, I'm talking about price. I'm up for any meal that costs less than five dollars. There really isn't a need to buy anything more expensive than that. Menu options like "dollar menu" and "extra value menu" are truly wonderful and if restaurants are literally going to give food away like that who am I to say no?

*Vending machines are like finding lost treasure. They are one of the lowest cost options for eating outside of hitting a drive thru. I can eat extravagantly for less than $2 including the soda and I only have to walk down the hall from my desk or the studio. I pay a little extra for the convenience (probably could knock breakfast down to less than a buck if I did the same thing at the grocery story) but its totally worth it.

*Only eat when you're hungry. This is the most important rule. Its a waste of money (unless someone else is paying) to eat when not hungry. There's no reason to eat three meals a day when you're only hungry once. It also keeps you from being larger than you should be. I'm 6'2" and 180 lbs. Pretty normal weight for my size.

Bonus: Put fast food ringtones on your phone. I have ringtones of the Taco Bell "Bong" bell, "I'm Lovin' It" from McDonald's, and the old school "Where's The Beef" quote from Wendy's all downloaded. It makes eating a lot more fun if the matching noises accompany the meal!